When we think about bravery, a lot of us immediately think of large acts of courage instead of the little ones that so many of us see and do each day. For instance, a man came to my barre class a few weeks ago. He’d never done that type of exercise before, he came alone, not with a friend, and he walked into a room full of women. That took some guts! But it worked out for him and he is now a regular client. I know of several women who have recently become consultants with Cabi, Pampered Chef and R & F. Props to them for taking on something new. That takes some courage to put yourself out there, especially if you haven’t been in a sales type role before.
But a lot of us don’t take a risk, even a small one, because we get stuck on the question – what is the worst that could happen? And while I absolutely agree that you should ask that question, you should also ask the question – what is the best that could happen? And even more important, ask yourself the question – what about the results that could occur that are somewhere in the middle? Because isn’t that where we usually end up? Somewhere in the middle?
Let’s take the simple example of interviewing for a new position. What is the worst that could happen? You answer questions poorly and you don’t get the job. What is the best that could happen? You nail the interview, you are offered the position and begin working with a great, new company. What could happen in the middle? Maybe you didn’t get the job, but you were a finalist and the hiring manager tucks your resume away in case their first choice doesn’t work out or something else opens up. Or maybe you didn’t get the job, you know you answered a couple of questions poorly, but you learned from your mistakes and are much more prepared for your next interview for a position that ends up being a better fit.
I am not inherently brave. My own mother used to call me a scaredy-cat. I was very quiet and I was the kid who always received a poor grade in “Participates in Class Discussions.” And it wasn’t because I didn’t know the answers. I just didn’t want to be the center of attention. Over the years, I have challenged myself over and over to face my fears in order to achieve my goals, but like most of us, I’m still a work in progress.
Just last month I had to face some fears. I’d really been wanting to take an instructor training for bbarreless, but none were being offered in the Portland area. The nearest training was being held in LA. Big deal, right? Fly to LA and take the training. Guess what? I realized that I had not traveled on my own since 1996ish. Every time I travel I’m either with my husband, a friend or a co-worker. And all of them know how to travel so I let them handle everything and I just tag along. So the idea of using Uber or Lyft or a cab or any of that was scary for me. I know, stupid, but we all have our silly fears. With no trainings scheduled in this area for the rest of the year, I had to suck it up and go on my own. It all turned out fine and now I know I can travel on my own if it becomes necessary again.
I’m currently trying to decide if I am going to open my own business or not. Talk about being out of my comfort zone. I’m networking like crazy which is absolutely not my strong point. I’m an introvert, remember? There is a reason that I became an accountant. I don’t like to reach out to people, I don’t like to set up meetings and ask for help, but I’m doing it! I’ve called a barre studio owner and chatted with her and I’ve met with someone I know in commercial real estate, a friend who is a financial planner, and a ballroom dancer who also wants to open up her own studio. Tomorrow I’m meeting with someone who does web design and social media marketing. Not easy, but I’m doing it and I’ve learned something from every single person I’ve spoken with. So many new challenges! I’m looking at demographics, researching competitor pricing, creating my own pricing models and calculating revenue projections based on various scenarios. Am I going to do it? I don’t know yet, but I’m certain that all of this learning and pushing myself will make me smarter, stronger and more confident in my future endeavors, no matter what they may be.
So I challenge you. What do you need or want in your life, but are too fearful to go after? It doesn’t have to be anything big. Maybe you want a new job, but haven’t interviewed for ten years. Maybe you want to learn to knit or take a class in martial arts. Maybe you want to try a new hairstyle or go salsa dancing. I encourage you to do it. Step out of your comfort zone. Maybe the worst will happen and you’ll make a fool of yourself, but maybe the best will happen and you’ll be a great success.
Diane Does It! 